2022

Finding a Charlie Brown Christmas tree

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We went in search of a Charlie Brown Christmas tree last weekend in the woods of No-Name Farm. It was my Beautiful Mystery Companion’s idea, to which I readily agreed. She drove the Mule while I rode shotgun as we bounced through the forest, looking for an appropriate tree, preferably a pine. The chainsaw was in the back of the mule. Hardwood trees dominate these 57 acres, but scraggly cedars grow throughout, never reaching significant size since the hardwood canopy keeps the sun from reaching them. There is a scattering of mature pine tree. We hoped we might find a pine sapling near one of them.

No luck. All we could find were cedar trees. We were in no hurry and meandered around the property as leaves rained down upon us, the spectacular fall foliage quickly fading under a stiff, steady breeze. At one point we got out and walked around, enjoying the relative silence, checking out the slough that crosses the center of the farm, once again full. Last year, we once spied a blue heron standing peacefully in the slough. I am not sure this is the same magnificent creature that occasionally visits Pancho’s Pond, which did not exist last year.

Finally, we agreed the Charlie Brown Christmas tree would have to be cedar. I spotted a skinny one near the front fence line that was about 12 feet tall. The chainsaw started right up and made quick work of the cedar’s trunk. I dragged it over to the mule, which has a small bed, about three feet square. We had to wrestle the cedar’s trunk into the bed, wedged against the tailgate, and lay the rest of the tree over the Mule’s roof. I held on to a branch hanging over the roof in front. The trip back was slow to keep from losing the tree. Again, we were in no hurry.

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 We have a beautifully decorated Christmas tree inside the house, decked by daughter Abbie. It is artificial but does not look it. She has quite a talent for decorating, so this tree looks like it could be in a shop window of Macy’s or Neiman-Marcus. If that library science graduate-school gig does not work out, she could easily make a living decorating.

Little Olive, our shy rescue cat, enjoys curling up for a nighttime nap under this tree. It makes her feel safe. Tater, about four times her size, prefers curling up in the dog bed in front of the fake fire logs. They are electric but give off a nice glow and a tiny bit of heat. The dogs, Mollie and Gatsby, pay the tree little mind, preferring the soft cushions of the couch, both usually curled up in or around my BMC’s lap.

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The Charlie Brown tree was intended for the back porch. I had earlier bought a tree stand. The tree’s trunk was too small to properly tighten the screws into the trunk, so we put the tree and stand into a metal container that usually holds plants. The tree was seriously wobbling, so I got a feed bucket of gravel and filled the metal container. That stabilized the Charlie Brown tree nicely, whose tip just brushed the porch ceiling. Next, I strung leftover colored lights willy-nilly all over that tree, whose branches were barely strong enough to hold them. Our Charlie Brown tree was officially decorated.

We discovered the next day that it would not withstand a stiff wind, which often blows out of the south, the direction the porch faces. No worries. I am a veteran of Christmas tree improvisation, having once nailed a stand to the floor because the tree kept falling over. I had to buy new carpet once the holiday season passed.

In the latest case, I hooked a bungee cord from about halfway up the tree’s trunk to a post that holds up the back porch. So far, so good. If the wind shifts to the west, I might need to attach a second bungee cord. I have one at the ready.

The Charlie Brown tree looks lovely at night, at least to us. And that is what counts.

 

 

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