I Was For The Bill Before I Was Against It

Print this entry

AUSTIN — It is strictly coincidence that I ended up testifying before a House committee of the Texas Legislature on April Fool’s Day. That august body, which meets for 140 days every two years, is in full warp speed with the session more than halfway over. I volunteer for a group that fights for freedom of information, open records and open meetings. That usually means battling a whole slew of bills each session against lawmakers trying to add more loopholes to make public records private. We win some, we lose some.

Sometimes the measure is well intentioned but misinformed, at least from our perspective. Sometimes it is simply bad governance. I have been volunteering along with a whole host of folks — journalists, attorneys, private investigators and interested citizens — for a dozen years or so. This is the first time I have actually come to Austin to testify. Our group ran thin on folks able to make the trip, so I’m here, lost in the underground Capitol annex. I am plenty early, figuring I would get lost. I find the cafeteria, decide to grab a bite and run into one of the folks who is also going to testify. He knows where we are supposed to show up, so I latch onto his coattails.

After lunch, we find our way to a room our group has reserved. The House has gone high-tech. We are able to register to testify, or in other cases, simply register our opposition or approval of a bill, using an iPad or laptop. The Senate, a much smaller body with fewer committees, still requires folks to sign in by hand.

I am actually testifying in favor of one measure, while a whole slew of us are testifying in opposition to another. It is what is known as a bad ol’ bill. There are a dozen bills or so in front of this committee, so we were warned in advance that we might be here several hours. The sign posted against using one’s cell phone in the committee room is roundly ignored. Nobody seems to care as long as an actual conversation isn’t carried on, but texting or scrolling through websites is tolerated. Everybody has their head down, staring at a screen.

I admit to being a little nervous, since this is my first legislative rodeo. There are only seven legislators up there, and they look fairly friendly with the exception of the chairwoman, who is rather snappish at times with witnesses. I try to give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she is just trying to move things along. What makes me nervous is that said chairwoman is the chief sponsor of the bill we are lined up to testify against in full force. But I’m slated to go next-to-last, so I’m not all that worried. By then, the chairwoman will be worn out and ready to be rid of us. We signed up purposely in order so that I would bat next-to-last.

After about three hours, I finally get to say my short piece about the bill we favor. That goes OK. The chairwoman asks a question I can’t understand, let alone answer, but she lets it slide. Maybe this is going to turn out relatively painlessly. We go back to waiting as other bills are heard, some of which may as well be written in Polish for all the sense they make to me. Nothing is voted upon but held in abeyance. I suppose that is how these things work.

Our bill finally comes up about 7:30 in the evening. We arrived in the committee room at 2. I wait for the chairwoman to call our first witness, a veteran of testifying in these matters. He will be able to handle the expected hostile questions from the chairwoman with his usual aplomb.

Suddenly, she is calling my name. For some reason apparently she is taking the witnesses in alphabetical order. This definitely puts me off my game plan. The few points I was set to deliver don’t make a lot of sense as an opening delivery for our group. But neither can I steal the other folks’ thunder either by delivering a full summary of our objections. So I step up there, say my name and my position on the bill and improvise in what I hope is an acceptable fashion. At least the more-experienced folks will follow.

The chairwoman interrupts me. “Excuse me, Mr. Borders, did you say you were in favor of the bill?”

Oh, man. This was not turning out well. I had to, for the record, reverse my statement and say that I was actually opposed to the bill. I am sure my colleagues behind me have collectively dropped their jaws. Luckily, I can’t see them. The chairwoman just smiled wickedly at me as I quickly finished my testimony. Mercifully, she only asked a few questions. The other members of the panel let me off the hook as well.

A few minutes later, I slipped out. A dinner engagement awaited, and I knew my colleagues could handle the rest of the hearing without me. It turned out the April Fool’s joke had been on me, but that’s OK. From what I hear, the bill has virtually no chance of passing.

 

Print this entry