2012

How To Cut Work Week by a Fourth

Younger people have a hard time realizing that it wasn’t that long ago the World Wide Web was a novelty, accessed with painfully slow dial-up modems. Widespread use of the medium now taken for granted arrived within the past two decades. At the outset, access required one to be tethered to a computer, but no more, of course. We can check email, Facebook and use Google to settle bar bets on our phone, sometimes by using voice commands. Teenagers take all this for granted, of course, in much the same way some folks of my generation believed that color television was an inalienable right and that...

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Adding Caro’s Book to the Collection

I have hauled my collection of 1,500 or so books five times and nearly 3,000 miles in two years. That means it is time for an oil change, I suppose. Actually, what I hope it means is that this time I am putting these volumes up on the shelves for a very long time. So I am unpacking and placing them with even greater detail than my OCD mind generally employs. I decided to literally unbox all books, place them on the office floor and then try to categorize them in a way that makes sense to my little brain. My Beautiful Mystery Companion wanted to know if I intended to use the Dewey Decimal System....

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It’s A Paint-Staking Job

I come from a long line of short painters. A few of my kin can actually paint pictures. My dad made a living as a commercial and fine artist, and my middle brother has followed suit. I cannot paint a picture that anyone would recognize. Fact is, I can’t draw flies. But I sure know how to paint a house. That is a good thing, since my Beautiful Mystery Companion and I just bought a rambling abode that will likely require something to be painted every weekend for the rest of my active life. Man, I miss Jaìme. For more than a decade my compadre shouldered the painting load at the various houses...

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Pest and Pestilence Time in East Texas

Rosie the Wonder Dog and I were walking one of Longview’s trails the other day, taking in the smells of an East Texas spring — honeysuckle blooms, mimosa-tree blossoms, that earthy dampness after a late-night thunderstorm. As happens, Rosie needed to answer the call of nature, and gave me The Signal. That means she quits being an obedient pooch on a leash heeling nicely to my left knee and starts jerking sideways. As in, “I have got to go potty, Big Human Guy. Let’s get off the trail.” I wonder if anyone has calculated how many hours pet owners spend in the course of a year patiently...

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Trying to Conceal My Pink Toenails

I ventured out this week to get new nose pads on my eyeglasses. The type used on these spectacles break off every few months. Without the soft rubber pad the glasses put an ugly indentation in my nose, which hurts. So off I went to one of the few business establishments left in America that perform a service for free. Most eyeglass stores make minor repairs gratis — such as nose pads or straightening up earpieces after I have rolled over on the glasses while napping. A few eyeglass stores have started charging, but there are plenty out there who don’t, no doubt reasoning that I am more likely...

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A Possible Canine Valedictorian

A baker’s dozen of dogs sit in a loose circle, about 100 feet in circumference, in the dusty floor of an arena at the Gregg County fairgrounds. The dogs are tethered by leashes to their owners. Both the dogs and owners vary widely in size and shape. There are four German Shepherds, a poodle, one of those bug-eyed carpet dogs whose breed I can’t place, a few Labrador mixes. And Rosie. That’s our rescue dog of unknown lineage. Rosie is a cinnamon-colored 14-pound dust mop, with a feathery tail and bounce to her gait. She draws admiring glances and frequent compliments when we walk along...

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Driving Under the Corsicana Daily Sun

In the 18 months I lived in Austin, while my BMC and family lived in Longview, I made the trip back Behind the Pine Curtain about 75 times by my reckoning. Lately I have traveled this route a couple of times a week hauling stuff back in the trailer. At 260 miles per roundtrip, that tallies to 39,000 miles. Sheesh. No wonder I’m tired. Roughly 90 percent of those trips involved the shortest, simplest route, which is Highway 31 from Longview to Waco, then I-35 to Austin. The exceptions were on holidays when I figured the interstate could turn into a parking lot, or if I was pulling the trailer...

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Illegitimate Cabbage and Butterflies

This is my next-to-last evening living in Austin. Nearly everything is packed, most going into storage in East Texas until we buy a house. A few tasks remain tomorrow, such as a trip to Goodwill, and loading up the trailer and the SUV with what will stay with me — clothes, toiletries, the computer, a few books. So I am indulging myself with a few hours on the backyard deck, reading magazines and breathing in the scent of the wax-leaf ligustrums that dominate the foliage off the deck. The smell of this hardy shrub — those in my neighbor’s yard reach the crest of the roof, providing a natural...

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Hunting For A House That Will Be A Home

My Beautiful Mystery Companion and I have begun house hunting in Longview. Sale of the barely lived-in Austin house is imminent. Packing is well underway. Wisely, I have kept boxes since moving away from Longview nearly two years ago. This will be their fourth use in 23 months. Nor will it be the last, since nearly everything I own is going into storage until we find a house. I’m shacking up with my wife, the BMC, in her small bohemian duplex on the south side. This will be the 13th home I have participated in purchasing, but the first for my BMC. Before we met, she preferred to remain free...

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Finally, A Trailer Trip Without Mishap

I took the slower but less stressful route from East Texas to Austin the other day. I was pulling my utility trailer back to begin loading up stuff in preparation for moving back Behind the Pine Curtain. After two years of living apart, the Beautiful Mystery Companion and I — along with daughter Abbie and Rosie the Wonder Dog — will all live full-time under the same roof. It makes me smile to think about it. This trailer and I endured a couple of life-threatening mishaps during the last move. First the hitch lock broke and the trailer popped off the ball, luckily without mishap since I was only...

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